Chapter 98: My inarticulate father
Chapter 98: My inarticulate father
Feng Zhenchang's return this time was treated differently from before. Although it was not a homecoming, he was very popular.
From the moment he arrived in Meijiawan, he was greeted enthusiastically by people who asked him about the business he was doing in the provincial capital. He knew very well that in the past, these people had not looked down on him as the son-in-law from the mountains, even though Meijiawan was also in the mountains.
But we are good at finding advantages in every situation: the big cities look down on the small cities, the small cities look down on the townships, the townships look down on the countryside, and the countryside close to the townships looks down on the countryside further away from the townships.
Meijiawan is close to the town, next to the provincial road, and it looks down on Fengjiachong, which is deeper in the mountains and not even connected by a road.
But now it's different. In a few days, Wang Changning's parents will follow him to the provincial capital. This is different from other people who work in factories and on construction sites, taking people from their villages out with them. They only take the young people from their families out with them, and someone has to stay at home to farm the land. Feng Zhenchang dares to take Wang Changning's parents to the provincial capital this time, so that they don't even have to farm the land. He doesn't leave them any way out. How can he do something like this without any guarantee? He says that the business he's doing in the provincial capital won't last long and isn't profitable. How could that be?
After leaving Meijiawan and returning to the village, Feng met with even more enthusiastic people, all calling him 'uncle' and offering him cigarettes. By the time he got home, he had enough cigarettes in his pockets to fill two packs.
He could clearly tell the difference between the way people called him today and in the past. In the past, people called him out of respect for his generation and age, but today it was different, a sign of respect for the person Feng was.
This is easy to understand. Nowadays, those children who work away from home have to save up to 1,000 yuan a year, and they have to be very, very frugal. Feng Zhenchang can earn at least 3,000 to 4,000 yuan a year doing this, and it is also something that can be done for a long time. Why wouldn't everyone want to do it?
In the countryside nowadays, people have not yet caught the impetuousness that has later spread to the city. The farmers are all down-to-earth, and no one is thinking of getting rich overnight. This is a long-term job that requires little investment and offers a good income, so everyone likes it.
So when Feng Zhenchang arrived home today, his face was even redder, his back straighter, his voice louder, and when he met the two neighbours who had been the best off in the village, he was full of confidence.
According to the theory of American psychologist Maslow, along the way, he had been fully respected, satisfying his higher-level needs, and so he was more confident. And this confidence added to his actions, so the aura he exuded was even stronger.
Of course, he is still a simple farmer who has believed in the middle way for decades and is used to being cautious. He still doesn't know how to put on airs and act superior.
However, his good mood was inevitably affected when he met Feng Yuxuan.
Feng Yuxuan attentively drew water for her father, brewed tea, and even fanned him afterwards.
However, seeing her father's face fall when he realised that the people who had come to work at home had all gone, she felt the familiar tension again.
Sure enough, once everyone had left, Feng Zhenchang started to lose his temper. 'You've been gone for years, you never write, and now you're back? You've grown up, haven't you? Well, don't ever come back!'
Feng Yuxuan was already a little disappointed that her mother hadn't come back with her, and she knew that her plans were probably going to fall through this time. But she didn't expect that after not seeing each other for a few years, her father would just start yelling at her as soon as they met.
He had not been home for three years working away from home, and even though he knew the family was having difficulties, he had not sent any money back. They had not seen each other for several years, but when they did meet, he yelled at her without even asking how she was doing. She had thought she had everything under control, but then she ran into a brick wall with her brother. Her carefully laid plans seemed to be falling apart.
Guilt, grievance, disappointment... Various emotions intertwined, she couldn't help but burst into tears. Feng Zhenchang felt a little guilty when he saw his daughter crying, but still pretended to be angry and went outside to smoke.
Vaguely, he could hear Feng Hongbing's mother persuading him, 'Yu Xuan hasn't been home for a few years, and that's of course wrong, but she's a young girl, and it mustn't have been easy for her all these years away. Uncle, you shouldn't blame her anymore, it's good that she's come back. Besides, she's so big now, how can she take it when you scold her like that?'
A little while later, she came in and said to Feng Yuxuan, 'Yuxuan, don't blame your father. You're a girl, and you've been gone for three years. Your parents don't even know what you're doing there, so how can they not worry? I'm going to say it for you: don't say that your father scolding you a little is justified, it's more like a beating. It's okay to take a few scoldings, it's all in the past, so don't cry anymore.'
If Feng Yiping were here, he would calmly tell Feng Yuxuan, 'What's there to cry about? This is just the way Dad and the rest of their generation express themselves.'
When Feng Yiping and his siblings were young, Feng Zhenchang must have hugged them whenever he had the time, just as he did when Feng Yiping first became a father. From time to time, he would use his stiff beard to pretend to prick them, making them laugh.
But as his children grew up, he was brought up in an era that believed in 'children are obedient when they are punished with a rod'. Perhaps it was the influence of his grandparents, or perhaps it was the division of labour in society, but he consciously took on the role of a strict father, believing in 'strictness and practicality bring love, while leniency is harmful'. He rarely spoke gently to his children, and except when he was beating them, there was no physical contact.
He never spoke gently and earnestly to Feng Yuxuan, saying, 'We don't expect you to support the family, but you've been gone for years without a word. Do you know how much we miss you and worry about you?
He would never tell Feng Yuxuan that every Chinese New Year, when he thinks of his daughter all alone away from home, he and Mei Qiuping can't sleep at night, worrying about her, avoiding Feng Yiping, sighing, the family not being together, and feeling that the New Year is not happy?
......
Although parents say that they won't favour one child over the other, in reality, of course, the sensible and obedient child will get more love.
But the saying is also true: 'All children are equal in the eyes of their parents.' Whether they are obedient or not, sensible or not, and whether they cause worry or not, they are all their children, so how could their parents not love them?
When Feng Zhenchang saw the daughter of another family, who had gone out to work with Feng Yuxuan, returning home every year and sending money home every month, he sometimes complained about his daughter's lack of understanding, even though he had been in a difficult situation.
Perhaps, 'hitting is affection, scolding is love,' and 'the deeper the love, the harder the criticism' are more suitable for parents to use on Feng Yiping and his sister.
This is Feng Zhenchang's unique way of expressing himself, and this is Feng Zhenchang's love.