[Book Four] Chapter 20: Trouble with the wife

Chapter 20: Trouble with the wife

“Daddy! Bad language!” Shouted Arianna accusingly at her father.
“I’m sorry, sweetie. I may have just found out where the bad man that hurt Auntie Ashley is and that made me upset.” He apologized as he walked around his desk to give a kiss on his daughter’s head.

She was currently doing some exercise he had given her to verify if she got her lessons of the morning right.

“... You’re forgiven. This time!” she said with a frown.

Rick found her absolutely adorable. She had no problem with Jennifer swearing but him? He was held to a higher standard. He didn’t know why and honestly didn’t care. While he was very familiar with his manner of speech he rarely swore so that wasn’t much of a deal for him to watch out for his choice of words.

“Thank you. You worked hard this morning, you can either stop and go play or finish what you’re doing.”
“I’m done!”
“Already?”

“HmHm.” she nodded as Rick checked her answers. They were all correct.
“Good work.”
“Can I go help Auntie EDI prepare Lunch?”
“You can ask her if she needs help but don’t you want to go have fun?”
“I’m always having fun with Auntie EDI. I’m learning something new with her every time.”
“Then go ahead.” he replied with a smile.

Both exited his office and she ran straight to the kitchen calling for EDI. He couldn't help himself but feel pride for her. She was advancing very fast in her studies and entering university level at eight was not an impossibility.
Coming out of his thoughts he contacted Jane and the rest of the crew (plus Anderson) and told them to meet in the control room where long distance communication was done. In less than fifteen minutes everyone was there and his mother and Hackett were connected.

“I think I know where their base is.”
““““Where?”””” they all asked in unison.
“Quaji.”
“Where is that?” asked Tali.
“Styx Theta, Erebus cluster.” replied Rick.
“The mother… he took over your bunker?!” exclaimed Jane.
“Probably. Beyond their initial purpose, they have no value. And the planets on which they are built are not really hospitable.”
“Are you sure?” Hackett asked.
“No. But it’s the only Bunker in the Traverse. Very close to the Terminus systems, can only be accessed through the HorseHead Nebula Relay that can only be accessed through the Serpent Nebula or The Exodus cluster.”
“And the Exodus cluster can be accessed easily by the Batarians.” said Hannah.
“It’s remote enough and in the right location.”
“How did they find it out?” questioned Garrus.
“Probably one of the people from Safeguard. But it makes sense that it would be this one. After all, it’s technically a fortified city with everything at his disposal to live for a long time there. It’s the perfect Headquarters.”
“That could make that warlord difficult to take out.” said Hackett.
“Possibly. Or not. I have special access to those bunkers. If they didn’t dig too deep into the code of the infrastructure I could take care of every pirate in one go.”
“How?” Jane asked.
“By taking control. Lock them in the area they are in and cut the oxygen. Nasty but effective. That could be problematic for the kidnapped people if they are in the same rooms. Doubtful everyone could be saved and I would have to infiltrate the bunker to begin with.”
“That is, if you’re right to begin with.” asserted the grizzly Admiral.
“Yes.”
“... We can send Alenko to scout for any suspicious activity.” proposed Hannah.
“Good idea. Depending on his findings we’ll plan out a plan of action.”

They spoke further of the matter, notably how to save everyone and evacuate them back to their homes, before ending the meeting.

Jane walked hand in hand with Rick back home in silence for a while until she spoke up.

“I’m not going back to active duty.”
“Okay.”
“Okay? I expected more than just an okay.”
“I’m delighted, Jane. That means you’re staying by my side… like you promised.”

It was a moot point for any foreseeable future as Jane was five months pregnant but in the years after their son’s birth? She could have put back the uniform on. Hearing that she would not, put Rick in a happy mood.

“The finale is this Saturday.” she noted aloud.
“It is… Not a particularly good moment. I did include the post Thessia on the ship to not end on such a bad note.”
“That’s better, I suppose.”

This season of Mass Effect started immediately with the Cerberus coup attempt. The public had the displeasure of knowing Kai Leng and the pleasure of watching Act!Rick accidently kill Udina. The new meme going around was of him with his hands raised in defense as if surrendering with the caption ‘Not my fault this time, I swear.’ used most of the time. The public had found the scene hilarious. He became another meme with ‘There is no…’ and the picture of him pointing downward to Han'Gerrel’s body (that had been cropped out of the picture). Jane’s unamused and ready to kill him face, became a meme too.

One thing the public was screaming about was Guys’ night after brokering peace between Quarian and Geths. They only saw the beginning around the card game and the results the morning after. Rick explained with a simple message.

“We don’t remember, so we couldn’t film something.”

That was a bullshit excuse and many pointed out that EDI must have footage of it and asked her for it. Her answer was cut and dry.

“No.”

The public still whined but that wouldn’t change a thing.

While what happened on Omega was glossed over for security reasons ( Aria didn’t want to and the Adjudants needed to stay unknown), the public understood as for why. The part that was included however was the whole affair with the clone. The public loved the music, Rick having done his very best to find compositions that fit to a T the action. Jane once again made the talk of the extranet when a replica of her dress during the Casino was used by Act!Jane and so did Rick in a more modest measure for the same reasons. Probably everyone gasped when the clone made its appearance and held their breath when she hit Act!Rick where it hurts the most. The chat even had a friendly betting pool (with no reward) about how fucked the clone was for that and not unsurprisingly no body bet against Rick not winning. Seeing CAT-6 sent flying and dying on impact through Rick’s rampage was oddly very satisfying for the viewers.

“Don’t worry, the nightmares don’t last long.”

That was the message Tali posted with her special privileges in the chat when the viewers commented on Rick riding on top of Wrex and killing pretty much everyone on their way.

When it was time for the confrontation with the clone and Brooks. The same simple but smug music that plays when Rick was outsmarting someone or that any opponent of the crew in an advantageous position was about to get wrecked was heard and the public knew that someone was about to get fucked royally. To their surprise it was Jane that made the explanation (something that Rick usually did) showing that she was smart herself but with Rick by her side she was outshone. Brooks' head exploding had been a shock to everyone.

Finally, Jane effortlessly defeating her clone in a biotic battle, made everyone realize that there was only one Commander Jane Shepard and not even a clone of her could take her down. Not even the oldest Reaper could, so a clone… But they didn’t know that yet.
Rick beating the clone to death was the most brutal scene in the whole series by far. Some loved it (the krogans of course) some were horrified. Most understood. They all knew how taboo a subject talking about his late wife and daughter was after that fateful episode and the clone twisting the knife in the wound… No one had been surprised or felt an ounce of sympathy for the clone (not like it got any in the first place) and what happened to it.

Of the whole season people had been happy to see the familiar faces of former crew members, like Thane (for whom many lit a candle for him in the chat) and Samara. Rick had changed the monastery story for a secret lab with Samara intercepting the SOS signal and going there to help her daughters who were scientists working there. The former Justicar had been pleased by that story and agreed to it. The name and location of course had been changed to protect the monastery and the secret of the Ardat-Yakshi; something that Tevos and the current matriarchs in charge had thanked Rick for. 

All that was left was the Thessia mission.

____________________________________________________________

When they arrived home they saw Ashley sitting on a couch with JJ in her arms, while she watched Adam, Sandra and Laura (who was present almost everyday) play a board game for small children. TK and AJ were sleeping in their room that was being monitored by a camera whose feed was displayed on the room’s screen on the wall.
Ash had gotten accustomed fast to her new arm. The skin to cover it had been grown but there was still some work to be done. It was made from her skin of course but without the rest of the body the skin would have rotted quickly so the scientists that made the skin were trying to find a solution. So far they were at an impasse, but Ash didn’t care. She had a functional arm and that was enough for her. She could pick her twins at the same time and that was all that mattered among other things.
Her artificial eye however was taking time, so she was just wearing an black eye patch.

“How’s my beautiful wife doing?” he asked, letting go of Jane’s hand and going to Ash to deliver a heartfelt kiss.
“Hmmm... Better, now. So… what was that meeting about?”
“Hell next residents. All supposition, Kaidan is on it.”

“I…”
“Want to be there when they’re sent there.”
“Yeah.”
“You don’t even need to ask. I’ll even let you push the buttons.” he said in a joking manner.
“Best husband ever.” she said and pulled him down for another kiss.
“Don’t you want to play with Adam?”
“Yes, but he’s having fun with Sandra and Laura. No point for me to ruin it.”
“...”
“...”
“I wonder if he even wants me here.” she answered sadly looking at her eldest.
“He does, he loves you after all. He just doesn’t know how to ask you things, so he’s behaving as usual. Playing with Sandra and Laura and sometimes Arianna when she’s free.”
“I’ve been here for two months and…”
“Did you ask him if he wanted to do something with you?”
“... No.”
“Did you tell him you wanted to spend some time with him?”
“...”
“Ash… Our boy is five, he doesn’t see you often but what he knows of you is that you love him and that you are a badass soldier who’s not home because she protects the galaxy from bad guys. That’s super intimidating. Then you come home with a robot arm and an eye patch making it even more so. I’m sure he has plenty of questions but if you don’t take the first step…”
“LUNCH IS READY!” came Arianna’s voice from the kitchen.
“Alright kids. Girls, let’s go wash our hands. Adam, your mother wants to talk to you.” Rick said as he picked JJ from Ashley’s arm who glared at him.

Whispering an ‘I love you’ to his wife he followed the girls to the kitchen. Obediently, they did as they were told while Rick put JJ on his seat. Maria came in with both TK and AJ and did the same. Once the girls were done, Rick washed his hands himself, kissed EDI who was putting the finishing touch on the meal and began to set the table.

“Daddy?” called Sandra.
“Yes, pumpkin?”
“Auntie Tali and Leeha are not eating with us today?”
“No. Leeha is at the nursery with Balden and Auntie is making an important call to her homeworld.”
“Why aren’t TK and AJ at the nursery too?”
“Because their mother is home for once and she wants to spend time with them.” he answered then added in a fake whisper a few more words. “And their grandmother would kill me if I put them in the nursery.” making his daughter and her friend giggle.
“I would not. I would think about it, though.” denied Maria but joked too.
“I call that progress.”

Finishing to set the table, he took the meal which EDI was done with and set it down. He had been right all this years ago when he had said that EDI was simply perfect, even more now with her cute little appro. She was lucky that they weren’t alone.
As he thanked her and sat down. Ashley entered the kitchen with Adam in her arms, a big happy smile on her lips. She silently said ‘Thank you’ and put Adam down on his seat and sat beside him.

Looking right and left, Rick could only see happy faces and that made him happy in turn.

____________________________________________________________

As expected, the fall of Thessia was difficult to watch even for the viewers that were not asari. The sight of the commandos fighting with everything they had and losing was hard to stomach. The music didn’t make the mood better. It was an upbeat theme good for any kind of dire and important actions on a battlefield but the predominant single violin contrasted severely with it. It played slowly and in a low tone; a sad melody making people understand that there would not be any miracle for Thessia and that the fight was already lost or at the very least the most desperate. On and on the music went, looping indefinitely as the team made their way through the reapers’ troops, watching asari die as they did, watching powerlessly, without being able to help or arriving too late.
Only when they reached the temple did it stop. To just start again as the fight with Act!Kai Leng happened. For the viewers, seeing the team fail for the first time was shocking though some had a good eye and saw that something was wrong.

“Not_Hamlet: [Dubitative] I don’t believe Kai Leng defeated the slayer.”
“°Rick<3°: There is no way that’s true! That Asian dude should have been dead with a vaporized head!”
“JenniferLover: Why the hell did he fight with his bare hands? He has his sword with him. Should have cut the little shit in two!”
“OctoDaddy: This one thinks it’s a ploy from the slayer.”
“TrueBlasto007: Getting stabbed? A Ploy?”
“X-_Destroyer_-X: Getting stabbed, no. Letting the asshole win, yes. @OctoDaddy is right.”

The escape from Thessia with the music still playing, a severely bleeding and unconscious Act!Rick and a view and sounds of Reapers destroying the planet brought everyone’s morale down the drain. And a new chain of candles was lit up in the chat.
The scene cut to most of the ground team in the Crew Deck waiting for Act!Chakwas to finish treating their friend. Another downer, even more when Act!Rick losing the use of his legs was revealed. For the first time people saw Act!Jane losing her cool demeanor when she was alone in her cabin, not unlike Act!Rick in the last season.
As everyone was in the com center discussing ideas on what to do, a cut to the med-bay was made with Act!Rick waking up for a few moments and saying something to Act!Chakwas. When the scene got back to the com center and Act!Rick’s words were heard, a slow and epic orchestral arrangement of Rick’s smug theme began playing in the background. The reaction in the chat was immediate. They knew a revelation was coming.

“OctoDaddy: This one fucking knew it.”
“°Rick<3°: That’s the Slayer for you!”

The on the fly plan that Act!Rick had made and the explanation that went with it left the people dumbfounded then cheering because Cerberus was about to get fucked hard. It was on that scene that the season ended.

“°Rick<3°: He’s the man!”
“SpaceCowboy: WAAAAAAAALD!
“JenniferLover: Damn, coming with that insane plan in this situation? Ballsy.”

Credits rolled, bloopers played then the fourth edition of the Q&A began. After welcoming everyone, Illiana started asking questions.

“The first question is for EDI. ‘Why didn’t you enter the Geths consensus?’”
“I wasn’t invited to do so. It would have been more than incredibly rude but also a declaration of hostilities for me to break in. I’m sure you wouldn’t like to have someone enter your mind without your invitation. That’s the same for the synthetics.” replied the AI.
“Second question is a general one. ‘What was the most difficult scene for you to do?”
“Escaping that geth dreadnought for me. Physically it was exhausting. Emotionally… Taking back Rannoch of course. Depicting for the next generations how that happened and being in Tali’Zorah’s boots, so to speak… That was… I was really emotional during all of it.” confessed Lorelai.
“Killing the Reaper on Rannoch. I don’t know how the Commander did it, but I kept doing my best to not fall from Ryan’s shoulders while aiming. I kept thinking ‘I’m gonna fall, I’m gonna fall.’ ” Christina replied, chuckling and so did the people present. “Otherwise… It was falling through the aquarium.”
“You did it yourself? Not a stunt double?”
“Yes, it was me. There was a safety net, a mattress and everything but it was a fifteen feet fall and I don’t deal with height very well. I could have left a stunt double to do it but… I don't know… I guess I wanted to prove to myself that I could do it.”
“Beating the clone with my fists for me. Being so enraged… not my thing. I’m a rather relaxed person, sometimes I get angry but enraged like that? Never. It was a real challenge to play that.”
“EDI?” Illiana asked.
“... Watch Legion pass away again. Thankfully the Geth infiltrator did a good job and only needed one take.”
“I…See. Next question then… It’s… once again a general question. What was your favorite scene?”
“Oh! Difficult, there are so many.” said Christina.
“True. Picking one… Not sure I can do that.” Ryan confirmed.
“Han’Gerrel’s death.” Lorelai said to everyone’s shock. “I’m sorry, I know it’s a bit weird but… seeing that ass die, or the representation of him… His foolishness cost the lives of many innocent quarians that didn’t want to fight and among them were some friends of mine. There was also Ryan playing the innocent man like ‘I followed your order to the letter I don’t get why you’re angry.’ with a bit of smugness and Christina’s face… It was just priceless.”
“I hate that scene! I just wanted to laugh because Ryan was acting like a perfect, childish, smug prick. I could feel him give some vibes of ‘What you gonna do now. Huh? What you gonna do? Can’t touch this!’ But I had to look murderous!” she said, making Ryan laugh. “See! That laugh! I expected him to laugh like that to my face and do a little taunting dance! How can you stay serious when you’re imagining that?” she exclaimed and Ryan sent her a kiss as he laughed. “You ass!” she said, chuckling.
“For me, it was Christina tackling Ryan down during the DnD session. Because of the camera’s angle you can’t see it but Ryan was being overly smug and Christina was doing her very best to not laugh. I had to restrain myself from laughing too.” revealed EDI
“Oh, yes. That’s a good one. I was making faces at Christina to try to break her out of character but she held on like a champ.”
“See! An ass!”
“You had fun too!”
“That’s not the point! Once I start really laughing I can’t concentrate anymore for a while! We would have wasted a lot of time!”
“It was worth it.” EDI said.
“See! EDI gets it! Anyways… I think… The best scene was the whole casino thing. The helmet is comfortable but always having it on? I don’t know how Rick does it. In that scene, I had a cool mask and a really nice suit. It was his actually, he lent it to me and gosh was it comfortable. And nice at the touch! For once I was more than a few minutes without the helmet while filming and it felt good. Cherry on the cake, you were absolutely gorgeous in that dress, Christina, you made me feel like a millionaire at the top of the world. Honestly I never felt so good about myself on the set.”
“It’s true that the dress was gorgeous. I was a bit apprehensive about wearing it. It shows a lot of skin at the right places but at the same time hides enough to let you guess. Way more sultry and provocative than the kind of dress I usually wear. I’m surprised Ryan didn’t have his eyes fixed on my breasts.”
“I’m a gentleman.” he said with a smirk.
“Yeah, sure! Anyway, the only problem I had with the scene is that… I’m rather proud of my girls but the Commander’s? I felt a bit dwarfed and of course we couldn’t do some rework on the dress because it wasn’t a costume, it was the real deal belonging to the Commander. So I had to get some filling done if you know what I mean and it was a bit uncomfortable after a while.”
“Really? Couldn’t the production buy one for your size?”
“That’s exactly what I asked and they told me no. The dress was made in 2013, it is extremely rare. It’s a relic and its price is in the seven digit credits!”
““What?!””

____________________________________________________________

“WHAT?!” exclaimed Jane as she got up from her seat in the theater and looked down at her brother next to her. “ARE YOU MAD?!”
“Yes but I’m also rich so who cares? Now sit back down, you’re bothering everyone.” the man replied as he took her hand and pulled down to make her sit.
“When do I get my own seven digit credit dress?” Asked Ashley from the side.
““And me?!”” Tali and Liara shouted from a few rows below.
“If Mr. Bean, his shop and his merchandise survived the destruction of the Citadel… Christmas?”
“I want two for my annual bonus!” Miranda said from the side.
“I’m not wearing a dress! I did it once, that was enough!” Jennifer replied, making allusion to her family wedding dress.
“I wasn’t expecting you to.” Miranda replied flatly.
“... You bitch! Both are for yourself!” gaped Jennifer as she understood her wife’s mind.
“Well… yes. Don’t tell me you don’t want to see me in that kind of dress?”
“... Dickhead, I want two too. Miranda’s size.”
“She’s as wealthy as I am with the fortune she inherited! Use your own damn money! And you don’t have an annual bonus!” Rick replied.
“I should have with all the work I do!”
“As your sister…” Kahlee began.
“No, no, no, no, no. I’m going to be bankrupt! Besides you have a husband to spoil you and I gave you the greatest school/ship in the galaxy. I think that’s enough!”

____________________________________________________________

“Oh! Rick posted a message in the chat. ‘Christina, we’re going to have a long talk about divulging sensitive information to the public and getting me in trouble with my wife as a result.’ ” Illiana read, barely stopping herself from laughing as she reached the second part of the message.

A chain of tombstones and skulls began on the chat from the male population. It wasn’t going to end any time soon.

‘Sorry!” the brunette replied not apologetic at all and everyone saw that.

From there the mood on the set and in the chat rose exponentially and the rest of the Q&A went extremely well.